For the last week I have been staying with 2 teenagers filling in for a stay-at-home mom who is "out of town". The father of the boys works in TV and is currently on location filming the final season of some TV show about an ugly girl for one of those 3 letter networks... or something like that. Anyway, I have spent the last week cooking meals, washing dishes, waking kids up for school,handing out lunch money, and many other tasks that a parent of teenagers does.
I am not ready to be a parent... at all. One of the kids I am staying with has A.S.D. (Autism Spectrum Disorder) and can be a hand full if he starts having a melt down. The other is a challenge as well, but in a different way. Both of these kids are going through a lot right now but this one really grasps the reality of this situation. He sees his family struggling and cant do anything about it. I can hear the frustration in his voice when family members and friends of the family call to check on him. He told me yesterday he wishes people would stop calling. "We are fine!, and we can handle this! Why cant they understand?", he said to me last night. I struggle with finding the words to say and struggle even more to try and understand what he is going through. I try to get him to talk to me about things but when he does all I can do is listen because I dont know what to say. I pray for him daily, but I wish I had words to say that would help.
I'm really fortunate to have the family I have. I grew up with both parents around all the time, who love each other very much. We went through very few hardships (at least very few that they let us see) and had very few conflicts. For all of that I feel truly blessed. I can not relate with the problems that this family currently is facing but my heart breaks every time I think about them.
Life is hard... Parenting is hard... it seems like everything is hard. Things get complicated and sometimes we turn to the wrong places for release. We are fragile beings not just physically but also emotionally and spiritually and sometimes life can get the best of our emotional-selves. Parents, you have a new found respect from me and what I am doing this week is only scratching the surface. I hope and pray that when life gets the best of us and we feel like we have nowhere to turn, that we turn to the guy with the answers.
"Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest."
1 comment:
I dig this man. I like your writing. It is really good. I need to read more. Thanks for your comments.
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